Keep in mind that I work at an Italian restaurant.
TABLE: Do you have anything that ISN'T pasta?
ME: Yes, of--
TABLE: Or soup or salad?
ME: Yes, of course. If you just flip the page, you'll see we have all kinds of seafood, chicken, pork, veal, and steak dishes. What are you in the mood for?
At this point the guest languidly flips the menu pages and wrinkles her nose in disdain. I guess she doesn't care for reading.
TABLE: *SIGH* Do you have lasagna?
ME: Yes, of course.
TABLE: Where is it? I don't see it!
ME: You'll find that on the previous page under Baked Specialties...at the bottom there. The first one on the list?
TABLE: Is the large size really $15.52?
ME: Is that the price listed? (she shows me the menu) Yes. That's the price.
TABLE: That's a weird price.
The young woman and her mother then converse in a language I don't recognize. Probably Lithuanian or something and they come to a decision.
TABLE: We'll share the large lasagna. We really just came in for dessert anyway.
What I don't understand is why they got the lasagna when they didn't want pasta in the first place. Maybe they meant long skinny noodles?
Anyway, those two ladies are officially ABSURD CUSTOMERS OF THE WEEK!